Goals

Goals man...what do you do to attain goals. Hard hard hard. What motivates someone to set and actually achieve goals. I have a ton of goals but sometimes just not one ounce of motivation to start, follow thorough and keep them until the end. It is so frustrating. I'm just throwing out what is on my mind today. grrrr. Work today was a ok. It is amazing how many of my co-workers throw around the *f* bomb! I finally asked why everyone keeps saying that word and i got the reply " it's just another word, it's people like you that make such a big deal about it that makes it worth saying". Not true..the fact is that it is not just a word..the word is meant to hurt or show mass amounts of anger and vulgarity and stuff of the inappropriate nature. Soooo that is how i feel about that. I put in for June 2 to be my last day at the coffee shop today. Kinda weird! I have gotten so so much donated and free stuff from there. That job defiantly has its perks!! Get it perks! Like a coffee perk. I don't know what that means but it sounded good at the moment! So thanks to Starbucks and my awesome boss! I am pretty sure that I'm going to let the hospital go for the summer too, sad about that but we just cannot afford for me to work with having to pay for two kids to attend a day care/babysitter/summer camp. WOW..can we say EXPENSIVE! But the awesome thing is that i will be able to pick up either or both when the kids go back to school..because i am so awesimo! So maybe ill be able to achieve those GOALS over the summer. I'm sure there will be plenty of time! I am still really missing my parents. The older i get and the older they get the more i want to just be close. Even if we don't see each other everyday. Life is short. Church was amazing as usual tonight! Great message about worrying and how hard it is to let go of the control in your life and to just give it all to God. I just thought that when you finally let go of control and you give it all to God then more times than not things do not start going quite the way you thought that they would when you "felt" like you gave it up. You were thinking you were being all obedient and everything. Well it starts a whole new cycle of worry! So i have to remind myself every second of everyday that even when i have gotten rid of it that i am NOT in control and that the plan He has for me is bigger and far greater than i can see. It is not just a get up in the morning and spend some time with the Lord and give Him everything and vwa la its all peachy. I have to pray on it all day sometimes. Then at night when i am getting ready to fall asleep, i pray all over again to let it go so i can sleep! Funny ha! I think so.